Eat the Elephant

"How do you eat an elephant?"

"One bite at a time."

I've used that riddle as a sort of mantra for my life this past year.

I tend to look at the big picture and become tired and overwhelmed. I see the whole kitchen that needs to be cleaned and decluttered, then my anxiety ramps up. Just looking at the barn makes me want to crawl in a hole. The enormity of the whole situation looms over me like a giant shadow, and I choose to avoid the task entirely. I've even had nightmares about it.

I finally learned to "eat the elephant". What does that mean? Instead of trying to swallow the whole task at once, I break it down into smaller bite sized pieces. I focus on cleaning out one drawer in the kitchen. After that one is done, if I'm feeling good about it, I might tackle another one. If that was all I could handle, I pat myself on the back for getting it done and go read.

I started with small projects and realized that each one made me feel better. When I had all the cabinets in the bathroom cleaned and straightened, I felt a sense of pride every time I opened the door. I also noticed my anxiety wasn't invading my mind.

Over the course of a few months I have cleaned out several drawers, cabinets, and shelves in the pantry and kitchen. I've rearranged rooms to make a nursery for my granddaughter (since I baby sit her). I transformed my daughter's room to a guest bedroom. I even got all the boxes and "junk" out of the attic (with help from a boy from church) and sorted it all out.

Not long ago I cleaned off my dresser and chest of drawers. Now, every time I go into my bedroom I feel so much better. I'm not tense or depressed seeing the mess I need to take care of.

Seeing the results of my work inspires me to go on to the next project.

Don't misunderstand - I am not a neat freak! In fact, I'm far from it. It's because I am a pack rat that I have all of this to organize and purge. I used to apologize to Maddy for not being a good housekeeper. Luckily, he didn't marry me for my housekeeping skills!

I've learned to make my to-do list in small chunks. I love to be able to cross off one or two tasks in a day. Getting organized and getting rid of the things I don't need or use has not only made me feel better about myself, it also has helped to keep my home neater and require less cleaning.

I guess, in a way, I've been utilizing the "eat the elephant" approach for my grief as well. From day one, I've focused on one day at a time. I've asked God for the strength, peace, and wisdom for the day, not worrying about the upcoming weeks and months. Very few times did I venture to plan more than a few days out, because I never knew how I would be emotionally or physically. My cancer also kept me on a day-to-day basis.

As time has moved forward I have been able to make some future plans. I'm currently in the beginnings of remodeling my house (as in hiring it done). I've put a deposit down on a cabin for a vacation in July. I've set some things in motion for financially planning for years to come. None of those came without worry and anxiety, though, I assure you. I'm taking those baby steps, learning how to walk on my own.

If you are overwhelmed with tasks you have to complete, maybe by yourself for the first time, just remember that you don't have to swallow the whole elephant. Break it down to one bite, one project, one decision, one day at a time. Pray for the strength for that day and leave tomorrow in God's hands.